I love steroids

Steroids rock. They should be allowed in all competitions, especially the Olympics. Everyone is using steroids, why not legitimize it? If you lose respect for someone just because they use them you're an idiot.

People seem to be under the assumption that steroids can make even the average moron able to bench press a car. I believe this to be wholly untrue. Even with PEDs the athlete still has to train harder than he has in his life to be the best. You must have the genetic potential, the work ethic, the talent and the willingness to do some steroids to be the best.

Just because I inject some more test into me doesn't mean I can suddenly deadlift more than Benedikt Magnusson. Even if I did do steroids and trained in a secret underground bunker for 2 years I would still be nowhere near his record simply because I'm a lazy idiot who can't be bothered to take training as seriously as he does.

The following is a list of people who definitely do/did steroids:

Benedikt Magnusson
Doyle Kenady
Kirk Karwoski
Ed Coan (Also a pothead, apparently)
Lamar Gant
Lance Armstrong
Louie Armstrong
Miles Davis
George Washington
Malcolm X
Richard Nixon
Ronnie Coleman
My uncle
Charles Manson
Marilyn Manson
Mark Rippetoe
Bill Starr
Doug Young
Me
Glenn Pendlay
Robert Downey Jr.
Peter Jackson
Dane Cook (More proof that steroids don't make you automatically good at something)
Sun Tzu
Even the Dalai Lama

I feel that it's obvious steroids have done more good than bad in the world. They help scrawny children get that much closer to a 135 bench press and without them we wouldn't have the strong guys we have to day and I thank god for everyday we get to enjoy steroids.

It's time people realize that steroids are not a big deal and to ban someone from competing because of them is a farce. Anyone in the top circuits of any sports will be using some kind of PED and if they don't get pinched because of it it just means they're too sneaky.

In the IPF and USAPL if you are even training with someone who has failed a drug test you will be banned. This doesn't mean they are dope free, it just means they're a bunch of sneaky bastards.

"But how can we spot these men who use steroids?" Why, I'm glad you asked. It's a pretty simple matter. Does he deadlift around 850? Does he weigh around the neighborhood of 320-360? Does he claim his gains are from eating big? Does he suffer from "Roid rage?" that causes him to make fun of bloggers constantly? I think we all know who I'm referring to here.

I'm looking at you, Kirk.

But seriously, society has to quit with this hatred for PEDs because it's stupid and only the people who are clumsy enough to get caught are criticized for it. Lance Armstrong would still be alive if it weren't for you people.

Here's lookin' at you, kid.

If you want to learn more about steroids, visit your local library, or read this really good 70s Big article. 70s Big.